Monthly Archives: November 2015

When Life is a Suck’n and Holidays Come a Knock’n

IMG_1832In the Walmart parking lot tonight I passed by a husband throwing up his arms yelling at his wife for how stupid she was spending more money on Thanksgiving than she made this week. Ah, and so begins the highly anticipated and equally dreadful consumer holiday spirit. Thank you Hallmark and Target for the unreasonable expectations of a perfect holiday in a broken world.

The last time I got to have Thanksgiving with my mom was 20yrs ago, in her hospital room. The homemade feast we lugged up five floors was cold and the radiation burned in her stomach as we tried to “make the best of it.” That sucked. This year I have friends who can’t escape loneliness, one fighting to live through the chemo that’s trying to kill her cancer, a friend who is losing a job right now along with a few hundred of his co-workers, a customer who’s son got jailed for the 3rd time this year because “he’ll never learn”, etc. “Happy Holidays!” It’s a bit unfitting to say the least.

Earlier this month I read some FB-posts giving thanks for each day in November leading up to Thanksgiving. They were primarily remarks of thankfulness for favorable circumstances which in turn can make any of us less fortunate to feel cursed. So, I challenged myself. I wondered if I could come up with a “thankful” list that didn’t point to warm houses, new cars, good jobs, loyal friends, life long romances, and perfect kids. All of these “blessings” for sure feel good and are worthy of thanks. They are also at risk of a sudden loss and that can make a holiday suck. At my desk, in-between my 50+ phone calls, I jotted some thoughts and ended up with a list of 30 unchanging realities. I really wrote this for my own meditation but after the Walmart episode I thought I’d share. Maybe, if your circumstances suck right now, you’ll find something to be thankful for that promises to never change.

Jesus, Thank You for …

  1. Your stunning wisdom and revelation insight, You keep me fascinated
  2. Your prepaid forgiveness for everything, that astounds me
  3. Your blood, it lets You see me just-as-if I’ve never sinned
  4. Your looks of love toward me
  5. Your eternal desires to be with me, I still can’t understand that
  6. Not flinching at my uglies when I dare to expose them to You
  7. My doubts and objections never convincing You
  8. Collecting my tears, that makes me feel cherished
  9. Hearing me, after all who am I to be heard by You?
  10. Drawing near to me when I draw near to You
  11. Resisting my pride, I would have fallen so many times if You hadn’t got in my way
  12. Helping me to know Your voice
  13. Making it possible for me to live without offense more and more, BTW this is blowing my mind more and more
  14. Healing my heartbreaks, where would I be without You?
  15. Never fearing to tell me the truth
  16. Making me courageous with Your very courage
  17. Trusting me with Your mysteries
  18. Never giving up on my ass
  19. Liking me
  20. Claiming me as Your own like You’re proud of me or something
  21. Holding me out like a light for others to see because You think I’m worth looking at over and over again
  22. Defending me
  23. Never letting shame separate us
  24. Being faithful to me, You’re resilience makes me marvel
  25. Making plans to always set me up for a good outcome
  26. Putting me in You; You’ve made me worth good things that I will never deserve
  27. Staying captivated with my potential in You instead of my weakness
  28. Singing n dancing over me with delight, I’ve never had that before
  29. Making my hopes float when hoping makes me tired
  30. Wooing me to rest in You especially when it doesn’t make sense… oh, and
  31. Not letting me marry a dude who shames me in Walmart parking lots:-)



9000 Days…

“Abraham labored 25 years for his promise. Then, when he got him, he gave him back up to God.” B Sorge 11-6-15

9000 days…

25 New Year mornings thinking “this could be the year” and 24 New Year eves resolving it was not. Impossible it is for one to wait for God to fulfill His words to you unless His grace is empowering you to believe one more day, one more year, one more decade…

I wonder… what year did doubt meet up with Abraham? What year did human reason try to work it’s mediocrity n twist God’s words? What year did his friends lose hope n stop encouraging his dream? In what year did the devil call him crazy? What year was it that the seduction of depression tried to win him over?

How many of those 25 years did he have to watch his friends get for themselves what he would only get through promise? Then how many more years did he have to watch his friend’s kids do the same while he remained managing his longings within the suspension of waiting through another year?

I wonder what year fatalism tried to take a seat? What year did the accusations against God push their lies? What about the year his aged body told him, no way man? What year was it that his own wife, needed to conceive n carry the promise, finally laughed him off….

Every year began with “maybe” only to end with “not yet”. Abraham walked upon a tight rope of God’s invisible words for over 9000 days of possibility. He saw them all pass him by but one. Absolutely impossible it was to endure faith without empowering grace.

Abraham’s next act of love for God would be greater than the first. Such love would have had no where to anchor if there had not been such a deep intimate history with God in faith through grace.

Everyone wants Abraham’s faith. Who wants Abraham’s wait?

“All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance. That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.”

Romans 8:22-25 MSG

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